I told my dad this and he was all, “Whaaaat? That’s crazy!” No it’s not, that’s my entire life, dammit!
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break my habits and my pride
and then crumble away the shells that form
around my soft, tacky heart
from exposure to the cold, drying wind
kiss the fresh skin underneath
and remind me
of who I wanted to become
remind me I have the power
and the strength
and the fierce courage
but first break me
break my stubbornness
and my inertia
break my pessimism
and break me free
first song I hear on the radio today…
How many are your works, O Lord!
In wisdom you made them all;
the earth is full of your creatures.
There is the sea, vast and spacious,
teeming with creatures beyond number-
living things both large and small.
There the ships go to and fro,
and the leviathan, which you formed to frolic there.
These all look to you
to give them their food at the proper time.
When you give it to them, they gather it up;
when you open your hand,
they are satisfied with good things.
When you hide your face,
they are terrified;
when you take away their breath,
they die and return to the dust.
When you send your Spirit,
they are created,
and you renew the face of the earth.
will you, one day
wake up next to someone new
and promise them
in complete sincerity
the same things you promised me
without the slightest recollection
that you’ve uttered the words before
I love you
or is sincerity enough to make it true
is strength of emotions enough to keep.
― Corrie Ten Boom, Clippings from My Notebook (via justbesplendid)
― Henri J.M. Nouwen, The Road to Daybreak: A Spiritual Journey (via justbesplendid)
I like weaknesses. I’m attracted to them, dangerously so. I like weaknesses because it shows a side of humanity that humanity itself never voluntarily wants to show and yet is what characterizes it. Weakness is what makes us unique as a collective entity. Perhaps my thinking this is rather dangerous and naive, for in reality it is what made me fall so completely for M; his weaknesses attracted me and my weaknesses allowed me to fall despite whatever warning signs may have been blaring at me. I swear at the time I thought I saw more. Weakness. But in all sincere truth, I like weaknesses not only because it makes us human and more relatable, but because in our weakness we are needy. We need each other and we need God. My mistake perhaps is this: I feel I need so desperately yet do not feel needed such that I fear my need and my need becomes to be needed. And in being presented with someone’s weaknesses I food myself into believing I am needed and that I am free to need guiltlessly. Somewhere in that train of thought there must be something that’s twisted because it fails me time and time again. But I do have needs, needs that stem fro my humanity and surely this must be true for others as well? Why then is it so hard to need each other?
her memory fades the moment I leave her side
She forgets the vibrations of my voice
the color of my eyes
the rise of my nose
and the tips of my fingers
But she recalls feeling the leaps of her heart at my words
the spins in her stomach at my touch
and that’s enough
for me to reacquaint her skin to me
for recognition to spark immediately
each time she returns to me
she can forget everything else
as long as she remembers my love